Unemployed Philosophers Guild
The origins of the Unemployed Philosophers Guild are shrouded in mystery. Some accounts trace the Guild's birth to Athens in the latter half of the 4th century BCE. Allegedly, several lesser philosophers grew weary of the endless Socratic dialogue endemic in their trade and turned to crafting household implements and playthings. (Hence the assertions that Socrates quaffed his hemlock poison from a Guild-designed chalice, though vigorous debate surrounds the question of whether it was a "disappearing" chalice.)
Others argue that the UPG dates from the High Middle Ages, when the Philosophers Guild entered the world of commerce by selling bawdy pamphlets to pilgrims facing long lines for the restroom. Business boomed until 1211 when Pope Innocent III condemned the publications. Not surprisingly, this led to increased sales, even as half our membership was burned at the stake.
More recently, revisionist historians have pinpointed the birth of the Guild to the time it was still cool to live in New York City's Lower East Side. Two brothers turned their inner creativity and love of paying rent towards fulfilling the people's needs for finger puppets, warm slippers, coffee cups, and cracking up at stuff.
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$29.99| /The Unemployed Philosopher's Guild | Freudian Sips | Mug
Unemployed Philosophers GuildWhat's a Freudian sip? When you say one thing but mean your mother! Say whatever is on your mind while you drink from this mug: it's what the fathe...
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$34.99| /It's Hard to Get a Handle on Philosophy Mug
Unemployed Philosophers GuildIntroducing our new line of porcelain cups made in the style of a yunomi (traditional Japanese tea cup) and debossed with original portraits! What ...
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$29.99| /Mathematical Formulae Mug
Unemployed Philosophers GuildThe plural of formula is formulae: that's just one of the many things you'll learn by owning this mug. Enjoy drinking a hot or cold beverage from t...
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$14.99| /Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Nikola Tesla | Magnetic Finger Puppet
Unemployed Philosophers GuildConduct your own magnetic experiments with this Tesla magnetic finger puppet. On your finger, he's a puppet; on your fridge, he's a magnet!Approx. ...
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$31.99| /Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Magnetic Dress-Up | Frida
Unemployed Philosophers GuildFrida Kahlo was an incredible artist, and so we're sure you can imagine she was also a very snappy dresser! This Mix-N-Match Magnetic Wardrobe dres...
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$39.99| /Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Albert Einstein | Plush
Unemployed Philosophers GuildThis dishevelled, nerdy man dressed in trousers and a simple sweater is none other than one of the greatest thinkers known to man - Albert Einstein...
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$14.99| /Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Sigmund Freud | Finger Puppet
Unemployed Philosophers GuildThe doctor will see you now! The famous Sigmund Freud now in finger puppet form, here to help out with all your cleverest jokes. He's carefully sti...
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$39.99| /Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Frida Kahlo | Plush
Unemployed Philosophers GuildFrida Kahlo was so different from all others in so many respects, that we're not certain if she ever played with dolls when she was a child. Nevert...
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$14.99| /Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Frida Kahlo | Finger Puppet
Unemployed Philosophers GuildArtist Frida Kahlo was best known for her striking self-portraits, so we'd like to think she'd be amused by this finger puppet version of herself. ...
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$39.99| /Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Nikola Tesla | Plush
Unemployed Philosophers GuildHold in your hands all the mad genius of the world's premier inventor, Nikola Tesla! Most famous for his Tesla coil, he also patented many machines...
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$39.99| /The Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Little Thinkers | Jesus
Unemployed Philosophers GuildOur collection of plush dolls inspired by the world's greatest thinkers, philosophers, artists, scientists and political figures are a perfect gift...
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$14.99| /Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Albert Einstein | Finger Puppet
Unemployed Philosophers GuildYou'll think the 'c' in Einstein's famous equation stands for 'cute' when you play with this adorable finger puppet. On your finger, he's a puppet;...
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$89.99| /The Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Higgs Boson Watch
Unemployed Philosophers GuildAfter the successful experiments of the Large Hadron Collider we have evidence of the Higgs Boson and this watch! So now you can look much smarter ...
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$89.99| /The Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Charlie Chaplin Rotating Gear Watch
Unemployed Philosophers GuildFor lovers of Charlie Chaplin cinema and giant cogs! This watch features the iconic image from Modern Times of Little Tramp stretched over a huge g...
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