Unemployed Philosophers Guild

The origins of the Unemployed Philosophers Guild are shrouded in mystery. Some accounts trace the Guild's birth to Athens in the latter half of the 4th century BCE. Allegedly, several lesser philosophers grew weary of the endless Socratic dialogue endemic in their trade and turned to crafting household implements and playthings. (Hence the assertions that Socrates quaffed his hemlock poison from a Guild-designed chalice, though vigorous debate surrounds the question of whether it was a "disappearing" chalice.)

Others argue that the UPG dates from the High Middle Ages, when the Philosophers Guild entered the world of commerce by selling bawdy pamphlets to pilgrims facing long lines for the restroom. Business boomed until 1211 when Pope Innocent III condemned the publications. Not surprisingly, this led to increased sales, even as half our membership was burned at the stake.

More recently, revisionist historians have pinpointed the birth of the Guild to the time it was still cool to live in New York City's Lower East Side. Two brothers turned their inner creativity and love of paying rent towards fulfilling the people's needs for finger puppets, warm slippers, coffee cups, and cracking up at stuff.

Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Sigmund Freud | Finger Puppet
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Sigmund Freud | Finger Puppet
Regular price
$14.99
Sale price
$14.99
The Unemployed Philosopher's Guild | Freudian Sips | Mug
The Unemployed Philosopher's Guild | Freudian Sips | Mug
Regular price
$29.99
Sale price
$29.99
The Unemployed Philosopher's Guild | Great Architecture | Mug
The Unemployed Philosopher's Guild | Great Architecture | Mug
Regular price
$29.99
Sale price
$29.99
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Frida Kahlo | Plush
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Frida Kahlo | Plush
Regular price
$39.99
Sale price
$39.99
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Albert Einstein | Plush
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Albert Einstein | Plush
Regular price
$39.99
Sale price
$39.99
The Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Star Trek Transporter | Mug
The Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Star Trek Transporter | Mug
Regular price
$29.99
Sale price
$29.99
The Unemployed Philosopher's Guild | Disappearing Dinosaurs | Mug
The Unemployed Philosopher's Guild | Disappearing Dinosaurs | Mug
Regular price
$34.99
Sale price
$34.99
The Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Jesus Shaves | Interactive Mug
The Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Jesus Shaves | Interactive Mug
Regular price
$34.99
Sale price
$34.99
The Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Magnetic Dress-Up | Einstein
The Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Magnetic Dress-Up | Einstein
Regular price
$31.99
Sale price
$31.99
The Unemployed Philosopher's Guild | Magnetic Dress-Up | Freud
The Unemployed Philosopher's Guild | Magnetic Dress-Up | Freud
Regular price
$31.99
Sale price
$31.99
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Magnetic Dress-Up | Frida
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Magnetic Dress-Up | Frida
Regular price
$31.99
Sale price
$31.99
The Unemployed Philosopher's Guild | Magnetic Dress-Up | Jesus
The Unemployed Philosopher's Guild | Magnetic Dress-Up | Jesus
Regular price
$31.99
Sale price
$31.99
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Einsteinian Relativity Watch
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Einsteinian Relativity Watch
Regular price
$89.99
Sale price
$89.99
The Unemployed Philosopher's Guild | Constellations | Mug
The Unemployed Philosopher's Guild | Constellations | Mug
Regular price
$34.99
Sale price
$34.99
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Freudian Slippers | Medium
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Freudian Slippers | Medium
Regular price
$45.00
Sale price
$45.00
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Captain Kirk | Finger Puppet
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Captain Kirk | Finger Puppet
Regular price
$14.99
Sale price
$14.99
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Spock Finger | Puppet
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Spock Finger | Puppet
Regular price
$14.99
Sale price
$14.99
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Nikola Tesla | Magnetic Finger Puppet
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Nikola Tesla | Magnetic Finger Puppet
Regular price
$14.99
Sale price
$14.99
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Nikola Tesla | Plush
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Nikola Tesla | Plush
Regular price
$39.99
Sale price
$39.99
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Little Thinkers | Jesus
Unemployed Philosophers Guild | Little Thinkers | Jesus
Regular price
$39.99
Sale price
$39.99